Adjusting back to normal

Poor kid. Seeing him crying to bed every time we leave his room at night is not exactly fun. Caleb, our firstborn, has always been an easy-going child. From the day we brought him home, we never had a hard time with him. From sleeping through the night early on, to being sick only twice his first year, we had it easy. So easy that when Abigail came along, we felt that we were being parents for the very first time; everything Caleb didn't, Abby does. Everything Caleb wasn't, Abby is.

When he finally moved from our room to his own room, we expected him to protest by crying for a few days. Nothing. When we took down his railings from his crib, we expected him to run around in his room in the middle of the night. Nothing. That little kid, all 19 months of him, managed to be in his own room, in the dark, with the door closed. When he woke up, he would simply knock on the door with those fat knuckles of his. No crying, no fussing, no anything.

When we came home from vacation almost two weeks ago, it was fun seeing him exploring his home, a place which seemed so familiar, yet somewhat strange. He remembered his room, he remembered our room, he remembered the kitchen, even his step stool. But being in his room by himself somehow became a brand new concept to him. Thinking that he would adjust without a problem, we put him to his bed, the first day we came home, turned off the light, and closed the door. Cruel as we were, we actually decided to let him fight off his fear on his own...poor baby. He was only 22 months old. Finally, from that night on and beyond, we had our very first hardship with him.

Fast forward to two weeks later. He is still struggling right now. Every night I have to stay with him until he falls asleep, then tip toeing out the door, hoping that Abigail will not decide to wail at that very moment. Fighting between sleepiness and the desire to want to spend sometime just relaxing, I have about 2 hours' moment of opportunity, and it would be time for me to nurse again. Often, Abigail will wake up right when I am about to fall into deep sleep. AHHH..I am so looking forward to the day when Caleb adjusts back to normal, and Abigail sleeps through the night.

Despite this time of inconvenience (I can hardly call this hardship,) I don't regret having them so close together. Of course, I miss the times when I could just leave the house, with nothing attached, and spend as much time out as I wanted to. But this is a different kind of blessing; I cannot complain when there are tons of women out there who cannot and will not ever able to experience motherhood. I cannot take this for granted. It is just a season; it will pass.